Post by andrakon on Nov 17, 2009 9:25:48 GMT -5
I found something good! A funny list of all the known derogatory and funny medical acronyms! Talk about Cynical!! This really shows off their professionalism!! ;D
www.messybeast.com/dragonqueen/medical-acronyms.htm
Some of my favorites:
Acute Lead Poisoning - Gunshot wound
(Acute Lead Poisoning) Air-conditioned - Multiple gun shot wounds
Hole-in-One - A gunshot wound through the mouth or rectum.
DUB - Damn Ugly Baby
FLK - Funny Looking Kid (sometimes suggests rural inbreeding)
FLK w/ GLM - Funny Looking Kid with a Good Looking Mother
FLUF - Funny Little Ugly Fucker
Gravity Assisted Concrete Poisoning - jumped/fell from height
Proof that you are being graded as a person:
High Serum Porcelain Level - Patient is a crock of shit
HIVI - Husband Is Village Idiot
Neuro-faecal Syndrome - shit for brains
PRATFO - Patient Reassured And Told to Fuck Off
Pumpkin Positive - a penlight shone into the patient's mouth/ear would encounter a brain so small that the whole head would light up
TAPS - Thick As Pig Sh*t
TSL - To Stupid to Live
TTOAST - Take Them Out and Shoot Them
TWSAM - Trash Will Survive And Multiply
WOMBAT - Waste Of Money, Brains And Time
YAVIS - Young, attractive, verbal, intelligent, successful.
Cockroach Factor - a patient's ability to survive trauma or serious treatment is inversely proportional to his contribution to society.
I fell on it - (also Eiffel Syndrome) universal explanation given by a patient with a foreign object in the rectum
MIDI - myocardial infarction during intercourse (heart attack during sex)
Brothelizer test - microbiology test (on swab or sample) requested by the Genito-Urinary Clinic or STD clinic to check for sexually transmitted diseases. A positive test result means the patient has "failed the brothelizer test".
Brothel Sprouts - Genital warts
Scratch and sniff - gynaecological examination
Throckmorton’s Sign - in the unconscious male, the penis points to the injury
BMW - Bitch Moan & Whine
GPH - Goddamns Per Hour
PBOO - Pine Box On Order
Pucker Factor - the degree/speed of constriction of the surgeon's anal sphincter is directly proportional to the patient's risk of sudden death
SEP - Somebody else's problem
Solomf yoyo - So long, mother-fucker, you're on your own
SWAG - Scientific Wild Ass Guess
Cut and Paste - To open a patient, discover that there is no hope, and immediately sew him up (or almost immediately - sometimes young surgeons practice surgical techniques for a while).
J P FROG - Just Plain Fucking Ran Out Of Gas (old age etc)
LOLFDGB - Little Old Lady, Fall Down, Go Boom
Michelin's Disease/Disorder - multiple spare tyres (obese)
Double whopper with Mayo - obese female with vaginal discharge
Dunlap Syndrome - belly done lapped over the waistband; obese (spare tyre, Dunlop being a brand of tyre)
And one I suffer from:
LWS - (US) Low Wallet Syndrome (No medical insurance or money)
And I found (probably the original) meaning of:
OMGWTFBBQ - a person mangled in a car crash
And a lot of doctors have these:
PHD = Pakistani Healing Dance (a useless procedure performed for benefit of patient and family)
And proof that some medical practitioners like to cop a feel!!
TUBE - Totally Unnecessary Breast Examination (might happen to a GLM - good looking mom)
www.messybeast.com/dragonqueen/medical-acronyms.htm
Some of my favorites:
Acute Lead Poisoning - Gunshot wound
(Acute Lead Poisoning) Air-conditioned - Multiple gun shot wounds
Hole-in-One - A gunshot wound through the mouth or rectum.
DUB - Damn Ugly Baby
FLK - Funny Looking Kid (sometimes suggests rural inbreeding)
FLK w/ GLM - Funny Looking Kid with a Good Looking Mother
FLUF - Funny Little Ugly Fucker
Gravity Assisted Concrete Poisoning - jumped/fell from height
Proof that you are being graded as a person:
High Serum Porcelain Level - Patient is a crock of shit
HIVI - Husband Is Village Idiot
Neuro-faecal Syndrome - shit for brains
PRATFO - Patient Reassured And Told to Fuck Off
Pumpkin Positive - a penlight shone into the patient's mouth/ear would encounter a brain so small that the whole head would light up
TAPS - Thick As Pig Sh*t
TSL - To Stupid to Live
TTOAST - Take Them Out and Shoot Them
TWSAM - Trash Will Survive And Multiply
WOMBAT - Waste Of Money, Brains And Time
YAVIS - Young, attractive, verbal, intelligent, successful.
Cockroach Factor - a patient's ability to survive trauma or serious treatment is inversely proportional to his contribution to society.
I fell on it - (also Eiffel Syndrome) universal explanation given by a patient with a foreign object in the rectum
MIDI - myocardial infarction during intercourse (heart attack during sex)
Brothelizer test - microbiology test (on swab or sample) requested by the Genito-Urinary Clinic or STD clinic to check for sexually transmitted diseases. A positive test result means the patient has "failed the brothelizer test".
Brothel Sprouts - Genital warts
Scratch and sniff - gynaecological examination
Throckmorton’s Sign - in the unconscious male, the penis points to the injury
BMW - Bitch Moan & Whine
GPH - Goddamns Per Hour
PBOO - Pine Box On Order
Pucker Factor - the degree/speed of constriction of the surgeon's anal sphincter is directly proportional to the patient's risk of sudden death
SEP - Somebody else's problem
Solomf yoyo - So long, mother-fucker, you're on your own
SWAG - Scientific Wild Ass Guess
Cut and Paste - To open a patient, discover that there is no hope, and immediately sew him up (or almost immediately - sometimes young surgeons practice surgical techniques for a while).
J P FROG - Just Plain Fucking Ran Out Of Gas (old age etc)
LOLFDGB - Little Old Lady, Fall Down, Go Boom
Michelin's Disease/Disorder - multiple spare tyres (obese)
Double whopper with Mayo - obese female with vaginal discharge
Dunlap Syndrome - belly done lapped over the waistband; obese (spare tyre, Dunlop being a brand of tyre)
And one I suffer from:
LWS - (US) Low Wallet Syndrome (No medical insurance or money)
And I found (probably the original) meaning of:
OMGWTFBBQ - a person mangled in a car crash
And a lot of doctors have these:
PHD = Pakistani Healing Dance (a useless procedure performed for benefit of patient and family)
And proof that some medical practitioners like to cop a feel!!
TUBE - Totally Unnecessary Breast Examination (might happen to a GLM - good looking mom)
